What are Maid of Honor & Bridesmaids Responsibilities?

OMG you just got asked to be the Maid Of Honor! That’s awesome! So…now what?

Today, the Maid Of Honor & Bridesmaids will support & help the Bride prepare for her wedding. This can include planning bridal showers, engagement parties, rehearsal dinners, sending invitations, and wedding day tasks like decorating, dressing, and calming any wedding day anxiety. 

It wasn’t always so…Let’s explore everything you should know to help your bestie walk down that aisle!

Where did the tradition of Bridesmaids come from?

There are a few thoughts on where the tradition of Bridesmaids originated, some more wild than others. The 3 most common are:

1. To Protect the Bride from evil spirits & kidnappings
   SRSLY! It used to be a tradition that Bridesmaids would dress like the Bride to confuse vengeful spirits or warring rival clans that might want to do harm to the bride on her wedding day. Perhaps this is why we still have a tradition of matching outfits for the Bridal Party.

2. Legal Witnesses
   The law in Ancient Rome required ten witnesses to be present at a wedding. These ten witnesses were usually friends of the Bride and Groom, which is how the term ‘Bridal Party’ was born.

3. The Bible
   Some cite the biblical story of Jacob as the origins. In the Book of Genesis, Jacob’s two wives, Leah and Rachel, both came with maids.

What is the difference between the Maid Of Honor and Bridesmaids?

The “Maid Of Honor”, is the principle Bridesmaid. Usually a sister, very close friend, or confidant, that the Bride can rely on. Basically, the Maid Of Honor is the assistant to the Bride. 

While Bridesmaids’ responsibilities are to be supportive and help as needed, the Maid of Honor will help the Bride out with whatever tasks are needed. This might include setting up the engagement party or rehearsal dinner and sending out invitations to name a few.

On the day of the wedding, the Maid Of Honor will help the Bride get ready, make sure she eats and drinks (it’s easy to forget when you’re so focused on everything else), helps with her dress in the restroom, holds her bouquet during the ceremony, and takes charge in any moments that need a soothing hand. 

What are Maid Of Honor Duties

Being asked to be the Maid Of Honor is a big deal and we want you to knock it out of the 

park, so here’s a list of duties you may be asked to help with:

Sync with the Bride
(12-15 Months before the wedding)
Take some time to sit down with the Bride to identify what she wants your help with. You could be asked to help with wedding dress shopping, Bachelorette Party planning or more. The key is to not overstep - it’s her wedding and you’re the support team!

Go Wedding Dress Shopping
(9-12 months before the wedding)
Bridal dress shopping can be one of the most exciting and emotional moments for a Bride. Be there to support her vision of her wedding day look, coordinating with other guests, and keeping track of favorite styles. You might also help with bringing champagne (if allowed), and be ready to celebrate with her for when she says “Yes”.

Make sure Bridesmaids all have their dresses
(6-8 months before the wedding)
Bridesmaids dresses should be purchased 6-8 months prior to the wedding to allow time for shipping and alterations. As a Maid Of Honor, you should check-in with every Bridesmaid to help them order on time and help with any final outfit details.

Plan the Bachelorette Party
(2-3 months before wedding)
This is your time to shine! Get ready to take charge and get creative when it comes to planning the Bachelorette Party. Remember the party is for the Bride, so invite the Bridesmaids, Family members, and other friends the Bride may want to have around her for the celebration. It’s also a good idea to check with the Bridesmaids about budget so you don’t go overboard..

Prepare a Toast for the Reception
(1 month before wedding)
As the Maid Of Honor, it is common practice to give a toast at the reception. Start writing early…winging it doesn't always turn out the way you hope. 

Have Your Hair and Makeup Plan Ready
(1 month before wedding)
Check-in with the Bride about the wedding day “hair and make-up plan.” It’s a good idea to try out a few different styles prior to the big day, that way you can guide other Bridesmaids, and arrive on the wedding day with your hair and makeup look ready. Many Bridal Parties book a stylist to visit them in their suite, you can help organize this, as well (on site stylists need to be booked several months in advance - plan ahead!).

Final Bridal Dress Fitting
(2-4 weeks before the wedding)
The Bride may ask you to accompany her for her final dress fitting. Just be there for her, help with changing, and getting the dress home safe-and-sound. This is also the time to learn how to bustle her train - the bride can’t do this herself, so she needs someone to learn how for the big day. You can read our guide on how to store a wedding dress before the wedding.

Keep Tabs on the Wedding Gifts
(Before & After the Wedding)
The Bride has a ton of things on her mind. Remembering who sent what gift and what thank yous to write may not be top of mind. During the Bridal Shower and after the wedding, keep a list of what gifts were received and who sent them. Once everything settles down and the wedding is over the Bride will have an easy list to follow to write thank you cards.

Wedding Day Responsibilities

There are quite a few responsibilities the day-of the wedding that may not be communicated, but if you keep these in mind the bride (and everyone else) will enjoy the day so much more!

• Be a point of Contact
  Make sure to learn as much information as you can about the wedding plans and what the Bride wants so when family, friends, or Bridesmaids ask you can answer any questions they may have. If you are the main point of contact this will save the Bride a lot of time and the stress of responding to texts or emails about where and when things are going to take place.

• Keep the Bridal Suite Clean (Day of wedding)
  Once everyone is done getting ready, make sure that everything is cleaned and brought out of the bridal suite, so you don’t have to worry about it later.

• Make Sure the Bride Remembers to Eat & Drink
  Throughout the day and before she leaves the bridal suite, see if the Bride needs anything to eat before the ceremony. While she may be too excited to think about food, a protein-rich snack will help any nerves she may have.

• Help the Bride Get Dressed (Day of wedding)
  Make sure that everything is laid out or hung up for the Bride before she gets there so it will be easier for her to put her dress, shoes, veil, and anything else on.

• Assist the Mother of the Bride
  From lending a hand with her hair and makeup, to giving her water, snacks, and sips of Champagne. Moms like to be helpful, so be sure to have a list of things she can help with.

• Take Care of the Bouquet (Day of wedding)
  Once the Bride walks down the aisle, help her out by holding her bouquet. After she says "I do," you can give the bouquet back to her so she can hold it while she walks down the aisle.

• Dance With the Bride (Day of wedding)
  You've made it to the reception when hopefully all the planning stress has gone away. Now it's time to celebrate on the dance floor with your best friend and all her family and friends. The bride and groom want to see everyone having a blast!

Don't Forget to Have Fun(24/7)

Last, but not least, your main responsibility may be to be an extra set of hands for the Bride, but don’t forget to have some fun as well. From an afternoon of lunch and mani-pedis, to a girl’s night in, the Bride will always be your best friend first. Laugh, have fun, and celebrate your friend's happiness. 

Additional Questions:

How many Bridesmaids should I have?
There is no minimum or a maximum number of people that can be in your Bridal Party although you normally want it equal on both sides.

What is the difference between a Maid Of Honor & Matron Of Honor?
The difference is based on the marriage status of the individual. A Maid Of Honor is not married, while a Matron Of Honor is married.

Can I have a Maid of Honor and a Matron of Honor?
Yes. It’s your big day - “you do you.” In fact, your two MoHs can work together to help with planning & setup. This can be especially helpful if one is located far away, as helping with local tasks can be difficult.